I'M YOUR MARTYR
by Potato92
Summary: Lucas is blamed for everything and it is spinning out of control. Can he save himself and others on the way. Or will he along with everyone else. Fall.
1. I'm Awake and Nothing Has Changed

Hi I'm Amy; this is **I'm Your Martyr**.

I really hope you like this story I put a lot of work into it… the entire story is already written and has been for a while so there will regular updates as long as there are reviews (hint hint)

_So a brief introduction_

Basically everyone hates Lucas, the reason will become apparent throughout the story so bear with it and you will really enjoy it!

So here it goes **_Chapter One_**

Here he was again; he had nowhere else, school was a chore even English was a chore; well how could it not be if you are surrounded by a room full of people that hate your very being, that use you as their scapegoat for all the misfortunes and failures in their lives. So the Rivercourt became his sanctuary, he took comfort in the concrete surface, the way the ball bounced rhythmically against the floor.

He needed this, it was his therapy. He wasn't going to get it anywhere else, his mom was grieving, he had no girlfriend anymore, he could not burden her with his problems, everyone else's problems. For he was their martyr, the man who walked around with their mistakes on his shoulders, but no one realized he could not do so anymore, his knees were buckling under the strain, his heart was failing under the pressure. He was the sacrificial victim but they were not willing to assist him in his time of suffering. He didn't expect anything else.

Everyone was pained, even if the scars were from a year ago; he still had to carry their guilt. They still could not forgive, for this would be his downfall and therefore their loss.

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His alarm went off, just like every other morning however this would not be a day as usual as the others. His mother was still in her room, probably still crying from the night before, so he showered, changed and began to cook his breakfast, a task usually undertaken by his grieving mother. He understood, well of course he did, as he was her martyr.

However this morning she had arisen and was prepared with words of spite instead of her past usual loving words and well wishes for the day. 'Lucas! What the hell do you think you are doing?'

'Making breakfast Mom' he sighed, she was in one of her angry moods.

'You know I used to make breakfast for Keith all the time, before…' He was wrong, she was in one of her sentimental, and this is all your fault moods.

'I know Mom' he couldn't do this anymore, it had been four months, he was trying with everything he had left to move on but she was dragging him back down.

'But now, he's dead! And I can't cook for him anymore,' he hoped that maybe, just maybe she wouldn't blame him today. 'All because you left him in that building with Jimmy, knowing he had a gun pointed at him' He sighed, he wasn't going to be lucky today, she was angry and he would have to bear the brunt of it. 'Why did you do it Lucas? You could have taken with you and he would be here now for the baby and me! I wish it was you dead instead of Keith!' She screamed.

He dropped the pan and swung his bag on his shoulder, knowing full well his English essay was behind his mother. But he couldn't, he just couldn't deal with her, not this morning. 'I'm sorry I'm not enough' He whispered as he walked through the door. His heart broke a little bit more that morning, and he couldn't help but hold his mother responsible for that crack.

Hearing him whisper those five words crushed her. She knew it was unfair to blame him, but she had no one else, she would never be able to hold Keith in her arms again, he would never be able to feel their baby kick. Lucas was the last one to see him alive; he could have saved him, couldn't he? She needed to blame him; otherwise she would have no excuse to be mourning still.

**_PLEASE REVIEW IF YOU ENJOYED IT OR IF YOU HAVE ANY CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISMS…_**

**_next chapter confrontation at school..._**

_**Amy**_

_**XxX**_


	2. We Need To Talk

**Thank you, guys for the reviews, they were really appreciated. I hope you guys are liking this and I'm sorry the chapters are quite short it just seems the most appropriate places to end them. I worked out today this is a 10 chapter story so here is your second, I hope you enjoy it : )**

**Lots of Love **

**Amy**

**xxx**

He jumped into the car Keith left him, praying that when he started the engine, he would ignite some feeling of happiness as well as the engine, but just like every other day it didn't, it just left him with a bigger dread filling his stomach knowing who he would have to face at school. He was now the social outcast, a label he was used to, he was one before Brooke, Nathan, Peyton and Basketball, the only difference he didn't have Mouth, he even blamed Lucas for Jimmy's death. He didn't have Haley, even Skills no longer socialized with him, he understood Skills though, his parents worked for Dan Scott, the man that gave him birth but nothing else and right now he despised him for the first reason alone.

Before Lucas knew it he had pulled into the car park, he parked it in a secluded spot afraid that he would have to deal with someone before he needed to. So as he did everyday he sat in his car waiting until the bell rang.

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It was first period, some clumsy girl by the name of Gigi had bumped into him knocking his papers everywhere before being ushered away by Mouth. 'Thanks for your help!' Therefore he arrived late for his next lesson; English, this was enough to make him want to top himself. It was a Friday, which meant game night and an entire day worth of lessons with people that hated him.

'Lucas, you're late, that's the third time this week!' Mr. Dylan exhaled noisily. Nathan sat in the second row behind the only empty chair scoffing.

'I had an accident in the hallway, sorry sir.' Lucas whispered to the floor, it was amazing how much self respect a teacher and a brother could drain from a person.

'Trust him to wet himself at school' he laughed as a many others from the class chuckled all except Brooke, who sat in the chair next to empty seat, silently wishing for his pain to end, she had hurt him enough.

Lucas glanced at Nathan and his posse surrounding him, there was Tim a.k.a Dim behind him, Haley, his supposedly loyal best friend to the left and Peyton to his right. The rest of the class was completed by Mouth, Gigi, Rachel and a few other randomers he had seen in various other lessons.

'Just take a seat Lucas.' Mr. Dylan said sympathetically. 'Oh and add your essay to the pile at the front.'

Lucas exhaled, 'Actually sir, I forgot it.'

Mr. Dylan rolled his eyes, 'Outside please Lucas.' He ordered.

Once outside, Mr. Dylan began his lecture and ended with 'I know this must be hard for you right now but you can't let your school work suffer.'

'Don't let my school work SUFFER! What about not letting me suffer?' Lucas yelled. Mr. Dylan looked shocked. 'Sorry, sir, I'll have it for you on Monday.'

'I'll let you off this time Lucas, but if I don't have it on my desk by Monday…'

'I know sir.'

'Go take a seat.'

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'Lucas!' Brooke whispered again. He was ignoring her, he had to, if she talked to him she would be penalized by their peers. Mr. Dylan was writing on the board as Brooke chucked a note across onto his desk. He was about to open the pink note with the name 'Lucas' so delicately written curvedly in the centre of the folded message, when he received a flick on the back of his neck from Nathan.

'I need to talk to you at break' he ordered.

Lucas was unsure of his motive but agreed anyway. As he turned back around to face his desk he met Brooke's eyes in a loving look. He could not take the intensity of her glare all he wanted was to kiss her and be able to call her his girlfriend again. But he couldn't he knew that. He looked away and found his eyes wonder to the precisely folded note. He opened it.

_Meet me after English has finished in the quad._

_Please._

_I'm Sorry._

_XxX_

_Brooke_

This day was definitely different. He slowly thought about it and nodded to her. She smiled in relief; she could not be rejected, not by him, her heart couldn't take it.

_**AGAIN PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	3. I Want To Fix This

**Thanks again for your reviews: D Here is the next chapter it has some BRUCAS! LOL**

'Lucas! Wait!' Brooke cried. 'We need to talk!'

The quad was empty, it was just the two of them and this would be the first time at school that they had talked since he found her in bed with Chris Keller and neither of them had slept since.

'What Brooke? What do you want?'

'I want to fix this!' She exclaimed, waving her arm between them.

'There is nothing you could possibly say to fix this, can't you just understand that?' Lucas knew their hearts were breaking but if he let her in, she would see it all, all his faults, all his mistakes and he couldn't let her see them, he just couldn't. He looked at her face and saw he eyes beginning to tear up and the tears slowly slipped one by one down her face. It was killing him to see her like that; he couldn't deal with it so he turned to walk away.

'Please…I love you! Doesn't that mean anything, just forgive me' she whispered.

He stopped in his tracks and froze up instantly; he did not want her to beg. He turned on his heel and steeped towards her. He kissed her tears and whispered slowly and carefully. 'I'm sorry, I have forgiven you and the truth is I love you too but I can't do this, I just can't allow myself to do this to you.' His eyes began to water and his composure began to fail him, so he walked away, believing those would be the last words they would share.

Brooke stared after him before falling to the floor in tears. She knew she would never love anyone more, she couldn't understand why they couldn't be together if he had already forgiven her. She figured he had his reasons. It didn't make it hurt any less though.

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Second period had passed with a surprisingly minimal amount of mocking, although there was the frequent broken hearted look from Brooke. He knew that look well. It had become his constant facial expression recently and he seemed unable to change it.

It was now lunch and Lucas was preparing himself to meet Nathan in the Raven's changing rooms. A weird location for a weird situation.

Lucas heard the slam of the gym door with approaching footsteps. He knew his brother was on his way, so with a quick intake of oxygen he stood from the bench he sat to greet his volatile brother.

Nathan walked in with a scowl, 'I just want to know, why would you go visit Haley; my wife who LEFT me knowing how I felt about it?'

'Why is this still an issue Nate? You and Haley are back together, you're happy. Why are you still treating me like shit?' Lucas knew he shouldn't yell but he was tired of this, he missed his brother.

'You visited MY WIFE-' Nathan was cut off.

'No I visited MY BEST FRIEND!' Lucas argued.

'After I told you not to!' Nathan continued, arms flinging around allowing Lucas to see his physical anger.

'I had my reasons Nathan!' Lucas said defeated, he couldn't tell Nathan the truth, the truth would make everything a hundred times worse. It was better this way.

'Yeah well you seem to have a lot of reasons for doing crappy things but no solutions, you seem to have a lot of reasons to punish Brooke for what she did with Keller even though you pulled the exact same shit on her!'

'What she did with Chris is not the issue!' Lucas whispered as if he was a small boy being yelled at by his father.

'And what about Peyton! Jake left because you screwed up when you slept with Nikki! If you hadn't then Jake and Jenny would still be here and Peyton wouldn't be shoving needles in her arm ten times a day trying to cope with her loss!' Nathan yelled. 'And everyday Haley cries because she had to choose between us Lucas! She misses you but she can't be friends with you because you screwed up!' Nathan exhaled.

'You know what I don't get, when you had that car crash last year why didn't you just make everyone's lives easier and just die cause then none of this would have happened!'

Nathan knew that this wasn't Lucas' fault but without putting the blame on him, he knew he would be at fault, it would be his fault and he couldn't admit that. But Lucas would be fine being saddled with the blame; he was strong, stronger than him. He could cope with everyone's anger and loss. Couldn't he?

Nathan regained his breath, yelling abuse at your innocent brother really took it out of you. He looked at Lucas and saw him looking distressed and his eyes were watering.

He couldn't stare at such a broken face any longer; he walked out the door and through the corridor. Maybe his brother wasn't as strong as he thought?

_**IF YOU REVIEW, YOU GET COOKIES? CYBER COOKIES!!!**_


	4. Why Did You Do It

**Thank you sooo much for your reviews, that was my largest amount for a single chapter ever YAY! Lol Keep it up!**

**Love you guys loads**

**Amy x**

Lucas just sat their crying, he couldn't deal with being Tree Hill's resident martyr, none of the crap that he allowed his friends and family to dump on him was his fault, why couldn't they see that, why couldn't they save him and why couldn't they see that he couldn't deal with people shitting on him all the time.

Peyton walked into the girls changing room and placed the CD player on the bench. Brooke has suggested it would be good to get the girls energized tonight before the game. As usual she was probably right. As she walked out the door ready to face third period, she heard sobs from the boys changing room. She knew she shouldn't go in but she couldn't help it. It was Lucas.

He didn't hear he come in.

'Are you okay?' She enquired, she blamed him for Jake's departure and therefore her drug addiction but she didn't like to see him cry.

'Yeah, I'm fine' He tried to smile at her, he felt guilty enough for her losing Jake, she didn't deserve him dumping on her too.

'Lucas, I'm sorry we're not friends.' She whispered as she sat next to him. 'I just can't help but feel it's your fault he's gone.'

'I know.'

'Why did you do it Lucas?'

'I didn't know who she was.' He protested.

'It was Nikki, he left because of Nikki. And because you slept with her, she stayed… But why would you even sleep with a random girl from some bar anyway.' She probed.

'I don't know it was a long time ago… I think I thought it would take the pain away from losing Brooke and you and everything else I lost at the time. I guess it was kind of like you with your drugs.'

'Don't!' Peyton stood, she couldn't be near him.

'Don't what?'

'You can't just make me lose Jake then talk to me about how I choose to cope with it! You should have stayed in Charleston then this wouldn't be happening.'

'You mean by coping, dumping the blame on me…' Lucas sighed as she walked towards the door. He believed she didn't hear his truthful words but she did.

She replayed the words over and over again in her head as she walked steadily down the hallway with tears threatening to fall. It was his fault wasn't it?

--------------

Lucas sat in the changing rooms for the entire of fourth period. He couldn't move, thoughts rushing through his head. Pain running from head to toe, his pain represented his loss and his loss was great.

He finally found his feet and slowly wandered towards study hall, a period he shared with the rest of his old group. He sat on a seat on the final desk, the only empty one, his class knew to leave an entire table for him because anyone seen socializing with him would face Nathan's wrath maybe not personally but Nathan controlled the social status'.

Lucas took out his books and sat down on his seat knowingly that due to his apparent loneliness, he would be able to get through one of his favourite novels, the only pleasing aspect of this day except basketball, the only place he could excel and be smiled at or cheered for, the rest of the time it was rare for a word to be spoken to him.

Haley arrived and looked for another empty seat, there were none. She rolled her eyes at Nathan and walked towards the only table with free seats. She knew she would have to sit next to Lucas, something she really did not want to do. He would always be her best friends but she could not help but blame him for how her friends were feeling right or wrong she still felt that way.

She dropped her books opposite him and pulled out the chair. She silently rolled her eyes as she saw the title of Lucas' book. An old favourite that was for sure. He never got tired of reading the same thing repeatedly.

'I'll do you a favor and not talk to you, okay?' he said woefully with a sad smile on his face.

'Was that supposed to be funny Lucas?' she spitted. It wasn't. 'God, you don't even realize what you are doing to everyone and you are sitting here cracking jokes!' She scoffed. 'You know what's really funny; you sit her acting like a martyr reading your fucking book while everyone else is broken hearted! Why don't you just crawl under a rock and die!'

Suddenly Nathan and Peyton let out resounding cackles from the other side of the room as Brooke sat next to them wishing to be mildly amused.

'Sure looks like it!' Lucas spat. He grabbed his books and stormed out of the classroom leaving a shocked Nathan, Peyton and Brooke on the other side of the room and a frozen Haley James Scott regretting her words. She was right to be angry…wasn't she?

_**I'D LOVE IT IF YOU REVIEWED… I'D LOVE IT SO MUCH I MAY UPDATE ALMOST STRAIGHT AWAY!**_


	5. I Know What YOU Did!

**HALF WAY THROUGH!**

**Thanks sooo much for all the reviews they really make me feel bothered to update for you guys. So anyway I hope you enjoy the chapter (and as always PLEASE REVIEW!!!!)**

'Hey man, sorry to call so late but can you do me a favor' Lucas said into the phone, he needed to try and fix everyone's problems, that was who he was, the martyr that saves people from themselves. 'Yeah well…'

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'Nathan Scott approaches the net in the final quarter, the scores are 34 – 36 to the Bears, but Scott is doubled teamed, he has no option but to pass to Lucas Scott who is behind the three pointer line. With two seconds left on the clock Lucas Scott shots and scores!' Mouth commentated as a roar from the crowd erupts signaling that the Tree Hill Ravens have won the game.

Lucas looked out at everyone celebrating. His mom hugging Deb in the corner, Dan smirking to himself, Rachel and Peyton cheering, Nathan and Haley hugging each other, then there was Brooke smiling to herself in the corner. He gave her sad smile and as he and the rest of the team left the gym to shower, Brooke pulled his arm and whispered into his ear, 'Well done Broody!'

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As the cheerleaders and players left their locker rooms and walked into the main gym, some evaporated along with the remaining members of the audience and some stayed like Whitey, Deb, Dan, Karen, Rachel and Mouth. There were also the usual hangers Brooke, Peyton, Nathan and Haley. They claimed to like the atmosphere after a successful game.

However there was an unusual view inside this gym; Dan and Rachel were talking. Lucas noticed this as he saw Dan grab Rachel's arm as she tried to leave him. He looked around; everyone else was busy with their conversations. Rachel broke free and ran off, as Dan joined Karen and Deb in their hushed talk. Lucas ran after Rachel.

'Rachel, are you okay?'

'Lucas, I need to tell you something and it's going to hurt you…'

'Okay?'

'Jimmy didn't kill Keith Luke.'

Lucas mouth fell open and his brows creased in confusion, 'what?'

'It was Dan, I'm so sorry.'

'Dan, Dan Scott' Lucas whispered.

'Yes.' Rachel nodded her head wildly, the tears flowing freely.

'Why didn't you tell someone earlier?' He yelled in a hushed voice.

'Dan threatened to kill me, I was scared.' She exclaimed.

'Okay, Okay,' He whispered as he took her into a hug.

'I need to confront him! Come on…'

'I can't! Luke please no!' Rachel screamed. Lucas called the police and told them what had been happening.

'Okay. It's okay, don't worry, you're safe! I'll look after you, please?' he begged.

Rachel nodded as he led her back into the gym where he saw his mother that had spent months mourning over the man she was talking to killed. Lucas saw red, he stormed over.

'Lucas don't!' Rachel screamed.

Lucas hissed into his ear 'I know what you did to Keith!'

Suddenly Lucas brought his round Dan's face and he fell to the floor clutching his jaw. The entire of the gym turned to see this act of violence; Nathan rushed over and held Lucas back; however Lucas broke free but did not move as his phone began to ring a silly tone that Brooke had chosen which broke the intense silence.

'Where are you? Outside…yeah you might as well come in she'll be really happy you're here.

Everyone was still confused about Lucas' sudden outburst as he continued shooting daggers at Dan, then the doors opened to reveal a small child and her father.

'Jake!' Peyton cried

_**THIS WAS JUST A FILLER CHAPTER THE JUICY STUFF IS IN THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS…. SO IF YOU WANT TO KNOW PRESS THAT LITTLE BUTTON AND REVIEW :D**_


	6. Poison in Full Flow

**Sorry this is so short but it was the place that made most sense to end it…**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter, the big drama will be coming up soon!**

**Amy x**

Peyton ran over to Jake and hugged him.

'Thanks for letting me know she needed me Lucas.' Jake thanked.

'You're welcome.' Lucas said distractedly.

As Dan stood, he began to speak, the poison in full flow. 'Beautiful moment ladies and gents, absolutely touching but you are interrupting the grand final of this evening.'

'Dad what are you talking about we won the game, that was the finale?' Nathan said confused.

'No I'm talking about another finale which for once in my life isn't about basketball' he said pointedly to Nathan.

Dan began his speech that would bring the end of their little world crashing down on them, with their martyr unable to catch the weight on his shoulders.

'Now Lucas here, great team co-captain, isn't that correct Whitey?'

'Yes Dan, now what in the hell are you doing?' whitey yelled expectantly.

'Proving a point!' he replied aggressively.

'A loving friend right Peyton?'

'He brought me Jake, that is enough…' she said worriedly.

'Uh huh…' Dan said knowing Lucas was feeling very uneasy.

Lucas' face gave his feelings away; he was angry, upset and apprehensive. He didn't even know it was possible to feel those all at once.

'Ammmmmazing boyfriend, OH NO sorry EX-boyfriend right Brooke?' Dan said, sarcasm dripping from his lips with every syllable.

'Dan, why don't you just fuck off' Brooke said triumphantly

Lucas smirked; Brooke always knew how to piss off Dan.

'I'm still mayor Miss Davis; please refrain from speaking like that to me!'

'Okay… sorry asshole!'

'Continuing with my point the best brother you could wish for, right Nathan?'

'Dad just leave! I won't stop Lucas from hitting you again' he replied

'Oh and Karen, the most honest son you could ever wish for?'

'Dan, what's going on?' Karen asked the fear overriding her ability to construct sentences together.

'Well…' Dan began, extracting joy from every word, every fearful look and every time Lucas flinched.

**Thank you for reviewing everyone, it really means something even if it is just a few words… so thank you.**

_**I LIKE TO LEAVE YOU HANGING :D**_

_**REVIEW PRETTY PLEASE.**_


	7. He's a Liar and A Fraud

**Thanks for the reviews guys! **

**They make me smile!!!**

**I hope I get more this chapter **

–**Hint hint–**

'DAN, JUST stop I already called the police straight after Rachel told me about what you did, you son of a bitch!' Lucas spat.

'What to you mean Lucas?' Dan began daring Lucas to say more.

'I know what you did to him!' Lucas exclaimed, as looks of confusion spread throughout the gym.

'I didn't do anything!' Dan laughed.

'Shut up Dan. Where the hell do you get off threatening a seventeen year old girl. You're sick!' Lucas yelled.

'And so are you literally' Dan cackled.

'What do you mean dad?' Nathan asked unable to look at Lucas.

'Continuing with my point, if you lot would let me finish...Lucas doesn't possess any of the qualities I named earlier, quite the opposite in fact, he's a liar and a fraud!'

'Dan stop! Or I will tell everyone about that day, the fraud, Haley!' Lucas threatened. Nathan looked up.

'They are going to find out what I did when the police arrive anyway, so why should you get away with this charade anymore.' Dan yelled

'Lucas,' Karen said, 'what's going on?'

'What do you mean Luke, you said Haley' Nathan said. 'Tell me Luke!' He screamed when Lucas refused to reply.

Lucas sighed and walked into the far corner of the room as everyone came forward as if he was a performer and they were circling around him waiting for his performance.

'I went to see Haley because I found some documents when I was living with him…Dan hired someone to kill her' Lucas said upset.

'What?' Haley cried.

'You fucked up bastard!' Nathan said running at Dan.

Lucas cut him off and held him back. 'Don't Nate! He's not worth it!'

'Luke be careful we wouldn't want you to end up having a heart attack!' Dan yelled

'What!' Karen screamed.

Lucas looked to the floor.

'Lucas here lied, he has HCM…whoops did I let it slip?' Dan laughed.

'Lucas, is it true?' Brooke screamed, her voice cracking, her emotions uncontrollable.

With his fists bunched together, his knees threatening to give way and his eyes threatening to spill tears, he nodded.

Brooke released a breath allowing a sound of despair to pass her lips.

'You know your uncle was just as emotional as you, lets hope you don't end up the same way!' Dan yelled

Everyone gasped as Lucas' distraught appearance turned to one of upset rage. Lucas lunged at him and punched him hard before Whitey pulled him away. 'How dare you!

How dare you kill him then slate him you bastard!' Lucas yelled forgetting their audience. As he heard his mom produce a choking noise, he knew he'd messed up.

'Dan killed him?' Karen cried.

'Mom.' Lucas whispered, tears escaping his eyes, falling to his cheeks then to the floor from which he could not steal his glance from. He was upset, ashamed and speechless.

'And you have HCM!' Karen screamed. 'How could lie like this to me, I've already lost Keith, is that not enough? I could kill you Luke!' she screamed, instantly regretting her harsh words, fearing the next events.

_**DRAMA!!!!**_

_**WANNA SEE MORE REVIEW!**_


	8. The Broken Man

**This was Lucas big reveal chapter… it was really hard to write so I hope you enjoy it :D**

**Amy**

Lucas stepped back shocked, his appearance once again paled and became one of a broken man. 'Well you're not the only one in this room who wants me dead right now or at least to have never to have met me! Well guess what, everything I have done, I did to protect each of you, I have been carrying around everyone's secrets, lies and betrayals because I didn't want you to through pain like this and the fact is I love all of you and I thought you loved me too' he yelled. 'Obviously I was very wrong.'

Lucas began to allow the tears to escape his eyes, falling to his face quicker than he could wipe them away. 'And to be honest I am tired of caring, I am exhausted from the pressure you all put on me to be perfect, well guess what I make mistakes just like the rest of you, and I am done with being criticized and scrutinized because I am just human like the rest of you, and most of the mistakes you make, destroys other people lives, but the thing is I don't blame it on you, I blame it on myself because most of the wrongs you do are always connected to me, I seem to be the central cause of pain even when I'm the one that is hurt!' He sighed.

'Like Dan, you took away my dad! The man that I loved most in the world because you thought he tried to take away the man I hate most in this world... yourself! Guess what it wasn't him it was your WIFE!!! EVERYONE hates you, your own wife even tried to kill you. And if I had been a stronger man I would have watched you burn to death, I still wonder why the hell I made the decision to save your worthless life, and now because of you I have to live with the fact that if I just had left you in the fire Keith would still be here.

Lucas was now shaking, frustrated and angry.

'And Nathan you pushed Haley away, she wanted to come back for you after the crash, but because of your stupid pride, you rejected her, if you had just let her back in I wouldn't have to have gone to see her but I blame myself for our estrangement because I told her to live her dreams and now I have to live with the fact that you hate me because I wanted to look after the woman you love.'

Lucas breathed in deeply. 'How is that fair?'

'Peyton you let Jake leave, but I do blame myself because the fact is Nikki wouldn't have stuck around if it wasn't for me. I know that! But I am trying so hard to fix this because I can't carry anymore pain around its killing me, so I brought Jake to try and make it up to you, thinking it would fix the hole in my heart, the pain in my soul, the voice at the back of my head telling me, I don't deserve a friend like you… and because I wanted to prove it wrong but standing here I don't think I have.'

'And Haley you left Nathan, you could have stayed, and everything would have been fine! But you didn't…you're lucky because you got him back but me I lost my brother for good but I blame myself and now I have to live with the fact that I put you above my brother and he hates me because of my decision not yours.

'Mom, I can't do this, I can't tell you you're wrong cause you're not. I could have saved Keith but I didn't and I wish with my life that I could change that but I can't.'

'And Brooke why did you do that to me, you didn't just stab me in the heart you twisted the knife! It was Chris Brooke, Chris! And I get that hurt you with Peyton, I GET THAT! That's another thing that I carry around all the time because it kills me a little every day to know that I did that to you and that I hurt you that much and now I know how it feels to be stabbed in the heart and I really want to blame you for my pain, but I can't because I did the same to you but really the thing that hurts is that I blame myself because is I still love you and I wish I didn't so it wouldn't hurt anymore but it does and the fact is I did it to myself.'

Lucas was now sobbing, wishing for his pain to end. 'And I'm done with being everybody's fucking martyr! It's killing me…' He screamed the tears running down his face, 'It's killing me…' he whispered to himself.

The gym and its contents stood still shocked to the very core by what their actions had cost the man they all loved. Everyone stayed stony except for Brooke who quietly sobbed.

'And I know that everyone in this room doesn't want me here, and the truth is I don't want me here either, I don't want to live with myself anymore, I can't live with myself anymore, if I wasn't here maybe everyone's pain would disappear and you could be happy. I wouldn't have to carry around the pain I caused you and the secrets that suffocate me and the betrayals that choke me because then I would feel alive! I would FEEL alive!!! But I don't, so the truth is I wish I was dead!' Lucas exclaimed as the emotions of the people surrounding him overtook them.

Cries and screams were heard within the next ten seconds, for those ten seconds saw a life being hung in the balance.

_**THAT DOESN'T SOUND GOOD….**_

_**REVIEW TO FIND OUT…**_


	9. They Were Right

**So this is the PENULTIMATE CHAPTER!**

**Thank you so much for reading!!!**

**Sorry it's taken a while, I did a rewrite, it didn't really work before.**

**So considering I put all that extra effort in you should review : )**

**Amy**

**Xxx**

P.S.

_I apologize sincerely for the lack of medical knowledge, I'm only 14…_

Lucas grabbed his chest as he collapsed, his head leaving a resounding pound against the wooden floor around the empty gym. Brooke rushed forward as Deb screamed 'It's his heart!'

As if on cue, police sirens broke the dead silence after the immediate exclaims. Dan didn't even try to escape; he was glued to the floor watching his eldest son collapsed on the floor clutching his chest and Brooke's hand.

It was his heart. Brooke thought. To everyone else in this room they truly believed that it was only in the medical sense that his heart is broken, faulted, attacked, but I know better, I know him better, I know that its our fault, it's his heart which he loved me with and cared for everyone in this room with at some time or another. It is that heart that we have broken. The same heart that might, that just might be too broken to fix.

Was this sick revenge for the actions taken by his inflictors; her included?

Was it him telling them that he was tired and finished with fighting them, the world, her?

Or was this the moment, which sent shockwaves shifting their world?

'_Dan Scott, we are arresting you on suspicion of the murder of Keith Scott…_' Brooke heard briefly as the paramedic rushed over, '_looks like a heart attack._' It was too much. She let tears fall as she grabbed Karen's hand that pulled her, leading her towards the local hospital.

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It had been three hours since they took Lucas into the operating theatre, three long hours in which every person in that waiting room had read each and every one of the posters stuck to the walls at least 8 times.

It had been three hours since Brooke had grabbed Karen's hand and it had gripping her it every second since. The doctor entered, alerting everyone from their state of shock, depression and fear.

'Can I speak to Lucas Scott's mother please?'

Karen got up still holding Brooke's hand. They weren't ready to let go yet.

'He has had a minor heart attack; we had to take him into the theatre to sew up a burst ventricle. He was very lucky; you should be able to take him home in a week, as long as there are no problems. You can go see him, one at a time for the moment; he should be waking up soon.'

Karen and Brooke both exhaled and Brooke hugged Karen and whispered to herself, 'he's safe!'

She knew somewhere that he would be okay, but she couldn't help but worry, afraid that his death would have been his revenge, the guilt would have consumed them all, a considerable retribution. But that, well that wouldn't have been her Lucas, he would not hold them to blame, he was their martyr, he would forgive them, but then again that position of the martyr destroyed him to begin with. Would he forgive? Because it was definitely their fault.

As Karen left to visit her son, to make amends, Brooke re-entered the waiting room awaiting the questions from everyone else. 'He had a minor heart attack but he's alive and he's gonna be okay.' Brooke smiled. 'In the medical sense of the word anyway' Brooke breathed quietly to herself.

Haley grabbed Peyton in relief, tears falling from their faces. Jake picked up Jenny and swung her around. Mouth and Rachel sat in the corner of the room holding one another's hands exhaling deep relief filled breaths. Deb and Whitey sat on opposite chairs smiling; Whitey had never looked so full of joy.

Nathan just stood their, rigidly, as if he could not come to terms with his brother's recovery. Suddenly a small smile graced his lips.

'So he's okay then, it wasn't my fault?' Nathan asked naively.

Brooke's face changed instantly, from one of confused joy to one of pure ferocious anger. She brushed her hair from her face as if she was wiping away Nathan's selfish words. Her arms flung from her sides, expressing her feelings.

'No he's not okay!' Brooke yelled 'We did this, we all did this, we tore him apart because of everything everyone around him did and you are standing there saying that we had nothing to do with this!' She inhaled deeply. 'This is BECAUSE of us! We'll be lucky if he forgives us.'

Her arms fell to her sides once again, in a stance of defeat.

They all knew deep down it was their fault, but she was the only one able to see it and express it with the truthful words it deserved.

Thoughts spun through everyone's minds.

_Is it our fault?_

_God, I messed up… I promised myself I would stop pulling shit like this._

_Will he blame us, more importantly; does he have the right to blame us?_

_I can't believe how stupid we've been._

_I have to fix this, he fixed me._

_What have we done?_

_I really fucked up._

Thoughts spun through everyone's mind. And they were right.

_**SORRY… **_

_**BUT FINAL CHAPTER IS NEXT… **_

_**I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT!!!**_

_**REVIEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!**_

_**Review**_

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	10. My Heart Is Too Weak

Wow so the end is here…

Sorry about the long wait, I had a family emergency which I don't really want to go into, which meant I had to leave the country so sorry to keep you hanging!

Thank you so much for all your reviews!

Please let me know what you thought of the ending:

Here's my personal thank you to you guys…

_**nemo123489**_

You are one of the best reviewers I have ever had, your reviews are always heartening and make me smile! I really hope the last chapter meets your standard. ENJOY!

_**FiveForFighting09**_

Another of my best reviewers! Your reviews are always consistent and really make me want to update quickly for you guys. I hope you like this last chapter and give me another of your great reviews lol!

**_tutorgirl0825_**

Thank you so much for your reviews. They are always short, sweet and encouraging. And I am really glad you enjoyed the last chapter, I felt it was probably one of my best.

_**BrucasLeyton4ever**_

Thanks for reading! Hope that you enjoy the final chapter.

_**Born.To.Die**_

Glad you are a big Brucaser, same here, kinda obvious but whatever. Enjoy!

_**AlexCurtis**_

Thanks for reading, hope the last chapter is to your satisfaction :

_**lucas4brooke4ever**_

Thanks for reading! I hope this last chapter makes you smile.

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Karen re-entered the waiting room four hours later, everyone except Brooke was asleep, clutching Lucas' grey hoodie that he brought to games, she always loved that hoodie; it reminded her of the good times.

'_Lucas!' Brooke screeched as her and Lucas ran through his door. It had been raining and they were obviously soaked._

'_Here wear this' Luke offered his grey hoodie and jogging bottoms._

'_Thanks,' she accepted, slipping on the bottoms and grey hoodie inhaling his musky scent. _

'_God I am sooo wet!' Brooke cried._

'_You should have brought an umbrella Brooke!' Lucas laughed._

'_It's the middle of summer Luke, we live in California!' Brooke said stating the facts, 'how was I supposed to guess it was going to rain? I'm not a psychic!'_

'_Nope you're a psycho!' Luke snorted in amusement._

'_Right! You're gonna get it!' Brooke laughed as she ran towards him; pushing him over making the two of them collapse on the floor. He tickled her all over, tossing her underneath him._

'_Stop!' She screamed in between laughs. She chucked her head forward, parallel to Lucas'. He looked into her eyes and smiled, there was no one else like Brooke Davis, and he had her, god he was lucky. He slowly tipped his head allowing his lips to meet Brooke's awaiting mouth. She giggled as Lucas slowly peeled her favourite grey sweater from her in an act of love._

No one in that waiting room knew whether it would ever be like that again, only Lucas did.

Karen slowly woke everyone up and asked them to go and get some sleep. Everyone refused to go home until they had seen Lucas and apologized. 'Okay, quickly all of you go see him but don't let the nurses see you.'

Everyone rushed upwards except Brooke who stayed firmly glued to her plastic chair, Karen questioned her. 'I just need to prepare myself for his rejection.' Brooke smiled sadly. 'But he's safe that's the important thing right?' She tried to convince herself, they weren't important right now she was and she would be okay with the fact that he would never want to speak to her again. Karen smiled as she excused herself finding herself in need of sleep and at the lack of an encouraging speech to give to the girl she considered her daughter.

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Thirty minutes later Nathan walked in 'Listen, I'm sorry about earlier, I was just riled and scared and stuff, you know I love him, he's my brother and we've all talked and he forgives us, I just thought you should know that.'

Brooke reached out to hug him and softly said 'I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have gone off at you like that, I'm just as at fault as you are, forgive me?'

'Already have!' He hugged her.

'So he forgave you all?' Brooke questioned wishing to be that lucky; she knew she had hurt him more than the rest; his forgiveness would be so much harder to gain.

'Yeah, he is fine with us all… he just needed us to notice HIS pain, shame it took a heart attack, you know.' Nathan shrugged, he'd been a bastard there was no doubt but he was going to fix that, they all were.

He kissed her on the forehead as he got up to leave. 'He wants to see you. Room 246.' He smiled as he left the empty hospital waiting room.

Brooke inhaled, Nathan's words echoing around her head, every brain cell occupied by Lucas. _He just needed us to notice HIS pain, shame it took a heart attack._

_--------------------------------------------------------------------_

_When you try your best but you don't succeed  
When you get what you want but not what you need  
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse_

Brooke subconsciously fiddled with her hair and outfit, if she was going down then she would do so in style. She was expecting to see her Lucas covered in wires and looking in pain. But as she walked through the door all she saw was a single heart monitor and a drip which were completely overshadowed by his welcoming smile. 'Hey Pretty Girl.'

_And the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone but it goes to waste  
could it be worse?_

'Hey Broody.' She began to tear up. It was hurting her so much to be this close to him, knowing her heart was about to shatter. If he rejected her, she was sure she would be the next occupant of a hospital bed.

_High up above or down below  
when you're too in love to let it go  
but If you never try you'll never know  
Just what your worth_

'I'm glad you're okay' Brooke exhaled making eye contact, 'and I get it if you never want to see me again but I just need you to know, I'm sorry' Brooke cried, tears pouring from the corners of her eyes, it was amazing what one boy could do to her, but he wasn't just any boy, he was her boy, her Lucas. 'And you will never find someone that loves you as much as I do!' she spoke clearly as she dragged one foot to the other in the chair next to his bed. She looked down and then looked up again to find her inches away from Lucas.

_Tears streaming down your face  
When you lose something you cannot replace  
Tears streaming down your face and I_

'I've wasted enough time being unhappy, and I'm tired of it, if you haven't noticed. I want to be happy with my friends and my family and you.' He smiled that irresistible smile, before pressing his lips softly against hers.

'You're active for a guy that just had a heart attack.'

'It's you, you're too tempting and my heart is too weak to resist.' He joked, smirking.

She kissed him again, harder and more passionately, it had been too long.

'And just for the record, you will never find anyone who will love you as much as I do!' Lucas whispered.

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you_

'Then we are perfect for each other.'

_**SO THAT'S IT…. YOU KNOW YOU WANNA TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT SO DO IT!**_

**_REVIEW!!!!!!! For the final time_** :

(Song lyrics: Coldplay – Fix You)


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